This is a completely imaginary conversation. No characters in the convo are based on real people – I’m just bored and imagining conversations I might have with editors…
Editor: I think your ideas for the ‘British food’ lesson are great. The listening works well. It’s just…
Editor: …you mention a fried breakfast. I probably wouldn’t.
Me: Why? Oh… wait. The sausages, right?
Editor: Yeah. And the bacon…
Editor: …and the black pudding.
Me: Okay… Can’t we just say sausages and bacon, but not mention they are pork? I mean, you can get chicken sausages, turkey bacon… there are veggie or vegan substitutes for both too. I’ve had them.
Editor: Any good?
Me: No, they were rubbish. Well, tell a lie, some veggie sausages are okay.
Editor: Okay. Well, to be fair, I think we’ll be hard-pressed to find a good image of a British fry-up with veggie sausages in it.
Me: Okay… Let’s just forget the fry-up. I mean, don’t most coursebook materials promote an aspirational lifestyle anyway? I imagine a Full English leading to a heart-attack is far from aspirational. Why don’t I replace it with some kind of hipster meal, like smashed avocado and poached eggs?
Editor: Because that’s only a staple in Dalston and Shoreditch. There’s got to be something more representative of ‘British breakfast food’ than that…
Me: Alright. What about some Coco Pops? That’s what I eat and I’m British.
Editor: Copyright issues for images. And they’re American.
Me: Muesli then?
Editor: It’s Swiss.
Me: Oh yeah, oops. We’re going to end up settling on boiled egg and toast aren’t we?
Me: Tut. Okay, Marmite soldiers it is.
Editor: They’ll be branding issues with Marmite…
Me: Boiled egg and toast it is.